I have had the honor to help my father in his time of need. He is at a “continued” stage of aging, he calls, his sunset years. He is two years from 90, 12 years from 100 years old!

I am reminded how quickly my last 2 years have passed me by, along with the past 12 years… I am thankful for this time I am able to spend with my father. A kind and gentle, often funny man who was always there for me…

His situation is not life threatening but he is in need of emotional and physical support.
It might be temporary or it maybe his new “base line” as his doctor has referred to.

Temporary or not at his age his needs will continue to grow. I am in awe that I am in a place in my life to be able to be there for him. My time is important and I know I must divide it so not to be overwhelmed. As I watch my dad continue to age, his once strong muscular body, weaken and frail, I am reminded daily the preciousness of life, love, and the purpose we are called to embrace.

For me, my purpose has been “care taking” a role I did not want or ask for… A life long career that has taught me patience, unconditional Love, being present to life’s Wonder and embracing the Awe of life daily …

Living my life filled with Love, Awe and Wonder…
A gift for which I am truly grateful…

10.11.12

Awareness of life all around you.
The date stands out…
Did you know?
There’s a sense of order today…
Like 1,2,3…10.11.12
Could it be?
A day of change
A day to rearrange
Your life, it’s priorities…
Your purpose may be near
On this day 10/11/12
when life’s Order is very clear!
Aweider

So I thought….

I find myself lost for words lately…
Not necessarily in the verbal context but with the written word. I write, I express my thoughts and feelings through the written word… So to be lost for words makes me wonder!

I wonder why my disconnect between my thoughts and my ability to express them lately… I have many emotions consciously and subconsciously that are unresolved.

To me, unresolved emotions are personal growth periods. Periods of time when the old is released and the new self has space and time to be cultivated through personal refinement…

Improving myself, by allowing life and all its situations to guide me in the direction of love and purpose without questioning why is what drives me.

The “Why” of life is what moves me forward, challenges me, and allows me to hunger for that healthy personal growth . My ability to live in a state of Love, Awe and Wonder keeps my eyes and heart open to the beauty that surrounds me … And life’s “Whys” are just one way of pushing myself to a place of living with the authentic me!!!

Hmmm, and I questioned myself being lost for words… Imagine truly if…

In wonder why…

My Non Traditional Traditional Life…

I have come to embrace my non traditional life as traditional …

The “traditional” life at my age use to look and be so different.

I would be celebrating my 30th plus anniversary any day now, my “wonderful” husband would be getting ready to retire soon and our dreams of being snowbirds would almost be here by now…

I used to miss not having what I thought was a wonderful traditional life…. To which I now say
REALLY? WTF (“freak” for all you traditionalists) was I thinking!!!
OMG give me my Non Traditional life
any day of the week!

As I head out of town yet again to Las Vegas for an Authors convention to follow my dream, then to AZ to hike the Grand Canyon with a friend, I am embracing a whole new way of a traditional life… the depth of my thankfulness is endless …

I spent many years wondering why?
What was wrong with me?
Asking myself Who am I?

Only to realize my Non Traditional life is MY Traditional life!!! And I couldn’t be more blessed …

To all my beautiful friends with wonderful husbands and getting ready to retire soon, I say, good job for staying married all those years…

To all my beautiful friends who are single searching for that husband …
I say, STOP looking and embrace your beautiful non traditional life as traditional…

To have found peace in a non traditional way… what an incredible feeling!!!

Like this leaf…
The LOVE was there all along…

Just in total AWE!