Love Awe Wonder…

Living Life Filled with Love, Awe and Wonder

Category Archives: Mom


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Mother’s Day…


Mother’s Day is a special day to remember mothers… I came across the only picture I could find of my mom holding me as a baby. I found it by accident this week on my computer. I can’t help but wonder…. That little girl (me) on her mommys lap, what were those early years like. Our early childhood memories of life why so few, if any? 

 I often wonder if this new generation will have more memories at an earlier age then their parents and grandparents did because of technology. I watch as my grandchildren love to watch themselves on videos. My grandson can’t get enough of videos to watch of himself which makes me wonder… Will he remember more as a young child then we did? 

Mother’s Day is the celebration of mothers who are living and those who are no longer with us… Daughters who have become mothers, and mothers who have become the mother of all “Grand” mothers… Mother’s Day is a day to remember mothers and all they are and all they do… Their unconditional love that allows them the “gift of motherhood.” 

Happy Mother’s Day to you… no matter if you are a mother of a child, a pet, or in a role reversal playing the part of a mother to a loved one… Being a mother is one of the most special gifts you can ever recieve…

Happy Mother’s Day ❤️


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Big World… Big Wonders

I woke up wondering about death this morning… It’s purpose, meaning and grasp of understanding what it’s all about. Losing a parent brings you to a place of wondering…

As memories flash through my mind and the reality of forever gone comes into play I can’t help but wonder… There’s a void in my mind, a black hole… Empty with no concept of even beginning to process the death of my mother. Reality says… She’s gone, thankfully died peacefully in her sleep. I look at a picture, read an old Christmas card, and I can’t help but wonder how to process life and death.

Daily I move forward at full speed ahead caring for my dad, knowing it will just be a matter of time to process the inevitable…
Embracing every moment with him, thanking God for this time and yet I still wonder…

Life, its meaning, its purpose… Death, its meaning and even its purpose…
We all will experience losses over a lifetime… And then there is the final loss, our own!

I wonder about the sadness in life. Those who are filled with hate, anger, jealousy and rage…
We all certainly feel those emotions on occasion, but for those who live filled with darkness I am saddened for their life. The precious gift we all have been given, the gift of life… We choose how to spend those few precious years here on earth during this lifetime. Somedays are filled with peace and those days when I feel the darkness, I try to step back, breathe and realize the gift that surrounds me… My life!

I have been blessed with incredible Christmas memories left behind by a mother who loved her children… I smile as I write with tears in my eyes knowing there won’t be a traditional “in front of the Christmas tree kiss” this year for my parents… My dad stays stoic with his emotions as the reality of my mothers passing sets in for all of us.

There’s a big world which makes me have big wonders…. Life, death and their purpose…

As the Christmas season is upon us, I am reminded once again of Gods gift, the life and death of his son Jesus. The birth, the life and the death celebrated by believers in the Christian faith…
The ultimate wonderment!

Living life filled with love, awe and wonder….

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Just One More Time…

My mothers passing has been a life changing experience for me… A “game changer” sort of speak! The game of life has been taken for granted daily. Nothing I could have helped without the understanding of death. I find myself wanting to hug my mom “just one more time”, as I wake out of a sound sleep in tears… It’s been a huge reality check of life’s priority and the importance of family, love and acceptance of others. Those little things that used to set me off or would consume me no longer do… Almost as if there’s a more important daily message to share with others with little said… I watched as a lovely woman became very impatient sitting next to me as we were boarding our plane… There were no connections to catch, it was our final destination. But the situation became obvious that another young woman needed extra help being seated, due to some kind of accident which made her very physically challenged… As I watch the first woman sigh and become visually impatient I leaned over to her and quietly asked “do you have a connecting flight?” I already knew her answer was no… We made eye contact and she began to thank me for allowing her to be aware of how selfish and impatient she had become… We smiled and laughed and I said “we all have a story to tell.” My story was the peace I have after my mothers passing and the happiness I felt heading to see my sister marry her partner…. Her story, a Breast cancer survivor! A moment in time both our life’s were touched by simply being aware of others around us. I am finally beginning to realize how precious life truly is. “Just one more time” isn’t possible for my mother and I, but it is possible for those around me today!

Hug someone you love today… Truly be present and hug them!

Living life filled with Love, Awe and Wonder…


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Processing Forever Gone…

Processing my mothers passing is bitter sweet… I am so thankful she passed peacefully in her sleep next to my dad after 63 years of marriage. But to process “forever gone” is difficult.

My mind which is filled with wonder, is thinking a lot more than normal…
Dad is now living with me, which I am honored to be able to care for such a loving man. My mourning is on hold while I make sure I help my father get through this difficult season of his life. Probably his last season….

There are so many emotions running through my heart and mind. The reality of the life cycle and aging should make this easy… But it doesn’t…

My own mortality is contemplated durning this process. The years that have passed, the mistakes that have been made, the ugliness that I’ve allowed in my life… All seems senseless now.

The gift of aging gives wisdom , a gift only to be received through the years… Wisdom in knowing death is inevitable, life is short, no matter your age, love lives on through those we touch…

My life has been filled with Love, Awe and Wonder, something I am truly thankful for… My moms spirit lives on through those she touched. After reading many cards I have found a common theme, she made everyone feel welcomed into her home… A home that is difficult to walk back into right now.

Her death makes me wonder about life and the presence of being present…
Love those you are around
Be in Awe of the blessings you are given.
And never stop Wondering about life, people, and how you can make a difference….

Love, awe and wonder….

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