Love Awe Wonder…

Living Life Filled with Love, Awe and Wonder

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I Saw Your Dash Today

1925 – 2014
I saw your dash today
And I couldn’t help but say…
Thank you mom for your love
All those wonderful memories you created for us…
The day passed by
Tears in my eye
A moment of life’s completion
Called death…
Life is not possible without death
Death is the completion of life…
A life filled with love and memories to cherish…
Memories, a gift given at the most precious moments in time…
Time spent with you mom, were sometimes challenging…
Most of the time,
A gift to always be cherished…
I don’t know what my tomorrow will bring…
Today, I have yesterday’s memories to hold on to and always remember your heart…
Its love for me and others…
I cherish you this day,
as I remember our yesterday’s…
I saw your dash today
And I remembered all those wonderful memories you gave me…
I love you mom
You will be missed…
Your dash will never be forgotten!



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I Wonder

I wonder what today will bring
and how I will feel
Seeing my mother for the very last time…
I wonder what emotions will surface,
And If joy will arise through this difficult day.
I wonder… will I choose to celebrate or Isolate…
I wonder what will happen to my dad,
How he will be and if his broken heart will ever heal…
I wonder if mom is looking down with a huge smile
Or has her soul entered a new life of living…
I wonder how I will handle processing the loss of my mother, and the care for my father…
I wonder what the future holds, about life and death and the meaning of it all…
Today is a day of wonder…



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I Wonder…

I wonder about life
Its stillness,
the complications of what surrounds.
I wonder about joy,
All the pain and suffering.
I wonder why few are chosen
And even fewer appreciate their blessings…
I wonder why some give
And others only take.
I wonder about peace within,
And spreading peace throughout the world…
I wonder…
Love possible
Hope a cure
Faith the answer?
And I wonder…
Why not just accept others
Embrace our differences
Love one another!

There’s a river that flows through our souls…
May your love move through your day like water running through a stream…



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Words in Your Head?

There are words in my head
That need to be said..
Thoughts of all kinds,
Some all mine.
Never to be shared
Some need to disappear
Others, I need not to care.
There are words in my head
Some thoughts have been said.
Thoughts of all kinds…
Overthinking has been mine…
For those words in my head.
What really needs to be said?
Thoughts in your head,
Choose wisely what’s being said!



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The Move

The doors opened and I had to believe it was for a reason. Today, will change my families life forever…

The move… My parents are moving to a senior living environment. I have been encouraged by all the professionals involved that this is the right thing to do. Which by the way only makes today slightly easier. Having been a care giver for family members for the past 20 years and still for my parents, this move is very emotional. The care giving won’t stop because my dad will currently be in independent while my mother needs memory care. Because of their two completely different needs, the must be in separate rooms… Done gasping?
We have all been very emotionally over my mothers dementia. My dad being physically weak, mentally strong seems to be easier to handle with this move for some reason. Perhaps it’s because he knows this next stage in life is inevitable.

The move…this transition from yet again one home to another type of living must happen at some point. The door opened for rooms at The Villages, which is a lovely senior living campus.
As I awake this day I’ve dreaded, I try to stay strong knowing my heart along with my siblings heart break!

I Wonder what tonight will be like for them? Tomorrow when they awake what they will feel? And how long this move will last. All stages in the aging process… There’s a last move I really don’t look forward to! I have been in a morning stage for the past year now, morning what is no longer. Morning what is to come…

On the positive side I am so thankful for the opening at The Villages, that both parents are still alive, our caretaker team is wonderful and that this whole experience is happening in a lovely senior environment. Staying strong is difficult, there continues to be lessons daily…

I was just a little girl playing outside for hours while my mom called us in for dinner and dad smoking his pipe, was my strong daddy who was always there for us. And that was just yesterday, or so it seems….

The most precious gift they gave to us was “memories”.
Memories of a childhood filled with love, playfulness, loving parents, cottage on Keuka Lake, vacations and priceless holidays just to name a few…

The move today is a lovely, positive place for them to continue to enjoy their sunset years.
Their minds and bodies are tired at 90 but there spirits continue to live each day that is given to them…
Watching this aging process is one of the most difficult challenges in my life… I will be there for them till their last move… I am truly thankful for all their love and support through the years gone by…
Thankful to have Blessing from two wonderful parents….

The Move
Today is that day
The day no one wants to say…
It’s time for a change
What once worked
Works no more…
One day closer to that final move
But till then my friend
Each day is a gift
Each move necessary
Each loved one, loved
Today is that day
It’s time for change
The move…



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The Chicken or the Egg?

There is a saying “life got in the way”…
which made me wonder this morning,
Do we get in our own way or does life really get in our way? Which came first,
the chicken or the egg? Questions that make me wonder… I haven’t had time or felt the flow of creativity to write lately… is life in my way? Or am I in the way of my life? My daughter said something to me yesterday that rang through my head all day… Something I will keep private.
As life throws us curve balls, do we continue to learn how to hit them? Or do we just strike out? I’ve become more aware of people’s energy lately including my own… And boy, oh boy, what we can learn from those around us… What not to be like and goals to set to achieve inner peace. There will always be situations in life that we don’t have answers for… Like which came first, the chicken or the egg? But in the scheme of things (called life) does it really matter?
Say Hello to your fellow human,
Say goodbye to those same people.
Connection, forgiveness, and love creates an energy of peace and happiness, which creates a great life!

See me
Look at you
Your Heart smiles too
Joy shines across your face
Peace follows
Love glows
Life is lived…
And Nothing can get in your way,
Including life!


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Making Change…
A dollar broken down,
A life broken up.
Change is inevitable.
Some wanted
Some unwanted…
Change can weigh you down,
Change can add up.
It’s value priceless
Growth from change,
Brings life lessons.
It’s currency endless.
Life is filled with change,
Acceptance of life’s change invaluable,
Today make the right change!



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A Word

A word…
The right word…
An encouraging word,
Changes ones thoughts.
Inspires ones motivation
And rejuvenates ones purpose.
A word…
The wrong word…
Cuts like a knife
Leaving a scar
Unable to ever be taken back.
It stings like a bee,
Bites like a vicious dog,
Numbs the joy in your life…
What they say,
And what you hear
Maybe the same.
But what you hear
And what they say
Can only be received
the way you allow it…
Listen and only accept those encouraging words!


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For Granted

I woke up breathing
And took it for granted…
The sun was shinning…
And I took that for granted too…
The warmth of my bed
The blessing of my home
The gift of being me
I’ve taken for granted…
I’m thankful,
But not always joy filled.
Every moment of every day
I pray, a wave of being present to joy
fills me…
An understanding of never taking anything for granted…
Embracing this life, its gifts and blessings…
Sharing them with others.
Allowing moments of authenticity
to flow…
Living in love,
Embracing the love within,
and knowing I am love…
Reminds me to…
Keep “for granted” at bay…
Drowning what was
Granting what is…

Copyright 5.6.14

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The Journey

The future is near
The inevitable is clear…
Emotions run deep
A calm begins to seep.
Days go by
As I try
to understand the cycle of life.
Babies are born
Parents will be mourned
Life continues,
Days filled,
Choices made,
Strength, held closely…
A journey which makes you stronger
A heart breaks that much more…
Knowing the inevitable is clear
And the future is near…